I know what you’re thinking: okay, Justin Bieber. Yes, we’ve heard the (sort of mean?) song over and over again on the radio — which seems to admittedly kind of haunt my single ears every time it comes on the dial. And although the words he’s singing to our ears are a bit invasive, there is a greater and wiser lesson here, little JB.
Love yourself is one of the toughest 20-something lessons we are faced with to learn, and newsflash: it doesn’t and will never end. So instead of completely ignoring the rest of this post and deciding that this sounds narcissistic, I encourage you to dig deeper into yourself and learn what it truly means to love yourself.
In my past, I continually lived for everyone else – and loved and served everyone else, over myself. In other words, what everyone else thought mattered what more than what I thought myself. Now – don’t get me wrong, loving others and spreading God’s love is our number 2 command, after loving God himself. However — letting others’ opinion of you dominate you and your thoughts can lead you down a nasty path that I think we all fall victim to (possibly daily, weekly, monthly, time and time again). So how do you get there? Let me tell you what has worked for me:
- Take a break from social media. This year I recently deleted my Facebook app from my phone. Although I work on instagram, I choose not to look through my feed between 9-5pm. Social media isn’t a bad thing if we don’t let it get the best of us. Setting boundaries is always a good idea.
- Don’t follow the status quo. One of the hardest things I’ve learned post-college is you don’t have to go out (drinking or non drinking) to have fun. Some of my favorite nights have nothing to do with anyone else – but have everything to do with an Anthro candle (this ONE), a great book (read. this. one.), and some flowers (pink peonies at Trader Joes, anyone?).
- Date yourself. I know I sound like a broken record here — but when people told me this after getting out of a 5-year relationship, I remember thinking, “HA! That’s funny – K so, how does this dating app thing work?” Yeah, no — little did I know that God had plans for me and they went a little something like this: s i n g l e. Meet yourself in the middle of the mess — it’s in the uncomfortable situations where we truly find ourselves.
- Dress yourself! This is why I am a fashion blogger, and this is why I love what I do. The way you dress is your message to not only the outside world, but to yourself. Make yourself feel comfortable. If you’re not comfortable in that short dress or low cut shirt, throw on a pair of jeans, sneaks, and a tee. Comfort matters and affects self-confidence. Choose wisely.
- Treat yourself. Get the sleep you deserve; you are a hard worker and rest is important. When you exercise or diet, be sure to also give yourself a break from both of those things — your body can only take so much. Eat the donut, because I promise you’ll still want the donut the weekend after. And that way it doesn’t turn into a i-want-a-donut-and-can-only-think-about-donuts-habit. You deserve a pat on the back from yourself. We spend too much time being hard on ourselves when, hey, we’re all doing a great job. You go girl.
I love my blog, and I love what I do. But I found that I was missing a purpose beyond the clothes. Thus, part of my “loving myself” inspired the idea of sharing some of the lessons I’ve learned with you all … on this amazing platform God has given me (TDD!). So I’d like you to meet “Darling Days” — my new Wednesday blurb where I’ll write about life, incorporate fashion, talk about faith (meet my boyfriend Jesus – laughing, but not joking here), and add in cute pinterest quotes and ideas to make you feel a little more like you .. and someone you can really love. XO